Loving hard will do you no good if you are not loving smart. The major cause of love disappoints in our day is the human tendency to suspend our minds,while the heart is in full gear. Over the years, I have propagated the inadequacy of loving with the heart and might, without loving with our minds and souls. The new breed of smart lovers will insist on a brand of love that abounds in knowledge and judgment before they decide to let themselves go in love. The following are symptoms of those with a low love IQ.
FAVORING PEOPLE’S RECOMMENDATIONS OVER PERSONAL CONVICTIONS IN LOVE: Many individuals lack the ability to make up their minds in love, as such, their love decisions depend entirely on the opinions of people around them. This can be very dangerous because no singular lover can be right in everybody’s eyes. Many have let genuine opportunities for love pass them by, because they were trying to force their lover to please everybody. The alternative to this is loving by your personal convictions. I am not saying you should be deaf to obvious warnings of trouble in love. I am simply saying you only receive such input from a few proven, trusted,and matured sources. However the decision for love to be or not should be personal and not communal.
- PUTTING COMMITMENT BEFORE ENLIGHTENMENT: These are the ones who get involved before they even know and understand what love really is. They also get involved before they really know who their lover is. They are the ones who make a commitment before they are really sure about what they feel. The underlying challenge here is wholesale ignorance. Knowledge is a crucial component of love. You can’t love what and who you don’t know. This means that without a strong foundation of knowledge in love, we are simply building castles in the air.
- PUTTING SEXUAL COMMITMENT BEFORE MARITAL COMMITMENT: Sex is the highest physical commitment that can exist between two individuals. Marriage on the other hand is the highest spiritual commitment that can exist between individuals. It therefore makes sense to me, for us to save the highest physical commitment for the highest spiritual commitment of our lives. Those who put the cart before the horse sexually, end up hurting in so many ways. Imagine that a particular vendor gave you unrestrained access to a product without pay. How motivated will you be to pay for the product if you have over used it? The answer to that question reveals why most men aren’t motivated to marry ladies they have sexually used up.
- SAYING WHAT YOU FEEL BEFORE YOU MEAN WHAT YOU SAID:. It is not unusual to see people who are in relationships that they never really meant to be in. One thing led to another and they found themselves avowing love to people they didn’t really love. This can be a painful situation. There are many relationship today that are only being held by the commitment of one partner, not wanting to hurt the other by leaving. This is why we must only say what we mean in love. Don’t say love when you meant like, likewise don’t just say like when you meant love.
VALUING WHAT YOU LACK OVER WHAT YOU HAVE IN LOVE:. No matter how green the grass looks in your neighbors compound, if you take over the property you will have to take responsibility for mowing it. Many husbands leave love at home, and go in search of lust. This reminds me of Kenny Kore’s Yanibo track. It takes soundness in love to keep on celebrating the value of someone you are already familiar with, in spite of the several temptations out there.
Succumbing to the errors above suggests that the person’s love IQ needs to be upgraded. Upgrading it could make the difference between the life and death of your relationship.
THE GREATEST IS LOVE