There is dignity and nobility in virginity. This is an undebatable fact. Owing to the fact that virgins seem to be the minority in our society, there is a need to assert the value and virtue of this minority clearly in the minds of people. The point in doing this is not to make non-virgins feel guilty, not at all. The essence is to enable our society to place appropriate value on these individuals, who are vibrant voices of morality in our time. You may never be called to love a virgin, but we can all at least respect the value that they represent.
One of the challenges of not being a virgin is the tendency to compare present sexual experiences with past sexual experiences. This experience gap in most relationships creates sexual dissatisfaction particularly in the consciousness of the more sexually experienced partner. This dissatisfaction could be the root of many love problems that we have. Virgins, however, do not have any past experience to compare their lover’s sexual performance with, as such there is great liberty to shape their sexual appetites according to the one they are with and this can bring great stability to a relationship.
Most of us remember the zeal with which we pursued sex when we were first introduced to it. Most of us just couldn’t get enough of it, it was a big deal in our consciousness and most of us went at it with all our hearts, minds and strengths. As the years went by most of us(non-virgins) began to get used not only to the idea of sex, but the act, and with that went the extreme excitement that came with it. The challenge of being in a life long relationship with the sexually used up is that you might have to cope with either their disinterest and apathy to sex. In virgins, the fire and desire is likely to burn longer and stronger and it could add a lot of zest to the marriage relationship. I believe the master plan of the creator in legislating sexual purity was that two virgins getting married would have gone at each other sexually with all the zeal and excitement in the world. Unfortunately, that isn’t going to be a practical experience for most of us.
The more sexually active we are, we run the risk of being sexually infected with diverse sexually transmitted diseases, which have long term consequences. Unfortunately, such diseased conditions, if not treatable, or treated well can be reserved for the ones we are to spend the rest of our lives with. I once dealt with a man whose male sexual organs had been reduced to half it’s size because of an STD he contacted in a moment of impulsive sexual expression. Whoever he marries will have to live with that malaise for the rest of their lives. This is perhaps why I insist on a mandatory sexual medical test before allowing non-virgins in marriage. With a pure virgin, none of these challenges exists, and we must commend them for that.
Am I now insisting on the aggressive pursuit of virginity as a prerequisite for marital involvement? Of course not. Those looking for them might have to wait too long. I am simply celebrating the ideal value that they represent in our society. Should you end up with one of them celebrate them also. Should you not end up with one of them, don’t judge, criticize or condemn them for their sexual past, after all, real love is meant to cover a multitude of sins. Finally, those that are virgins should not seek to lose it carelessly and those that aren’t should accept themselves and seek to live sexually responsible lives in future. None of us can change our history, but we sure can rewrite our destinies. I believe in you.
THE GREATEST IS LOVE