We have been dealing with how to solve complex love equations. Today, we want to consider what to do when you are in love with someone you don’t know. I have noticed that many people have a tendency to gamble with their emotional lives. Such people tend to believe that having a successful relationship is a matter of chance and luck.Such people tend to take crazy risks with their heart that they can’t even take with their minds. One major element of love gamblers is that they often fall in love with people they don’t know. Starting a relationship with someone you don’t really know is playing the lottery with your emotional life. It is bound to fail.

Beyond the fact that being a professional gambler bases your winning upon sheer luck,gamblers tend to lose regularly and win occasionally. The other challenge of gambling is that it will most likely cost you more than it can pay you. Finally even if a gambler wins they are seldom able to manage the proceeds of their gambling effectively. In fact most of them loose all their wealth and are back at the gambling table to try to earn a living again.

Likewise love gamblers who base their love lives upon luck, often loose regularly and win occasionally,if ever they do. Emotional gambling will most likely cost you more than it will pay you. Playing the love lottery of life means that you might not be able to maximize the wealth of the love you have found because you got it by chance and not intentionally. Often times a love gambler is back after a year or so looking for love in all the hopeless places of life. Please be intentional about your love life and don’t gamble with the emotions of your heart.

From my years in management consulting we were exposed to a feasibility assessment tool called SWOT analysis. S stands for strengths,W stands for weaknesses, O stands for opportunities and T stands for threats. This enabled us evaluate the viability of every economic idea that we were presented with,so as not to waste precious resources on unproductive ventures.

In other to know your lover and determine the viability of your emotional investments,you also must conduct a SWOT analysis of every serious love prospect you come across. This will ensure that you aren’t gambling with your emotional life sentimentally.

  • What are your prospective partner’s strengths? This represents the areas that your potential partner is good at. This isn’t difficult to discover because it is natural to display our strengths when trying to convince our lovers. I believe that true love,takes responsibility for the development of the strengths of another. Two are meant to be better than one,so as to have a better reward for their labor.
  • What are the weaknesses of your partner? Though every partner will project their strengths to you. It is your responsibility to discover their hidden weaknesses. Discovering your prospect’s weaknesses is important because if you cannot compensate for their weaknesses,you have no business,being in a relationship with them. These weaknesses can also undermine the success of your love enterprise. Knowing them also helps you to answer the question; Am I willing to live with this for the rest of my life?
  • What are the opportunities of being in love with this particular partner? Every lover represents an opportunity or a set of them. Several years ago a lady asked me what she should do because she had multiple viable prospects asking for her hand in marriage. I answered that though everyone of them may claim to love her,she should say yes to the one that represents the greatest opportunity for actualizing her destiny. So you must be clear about the strategic opportunities that your partner represents.
  • What are the threats to your love for them and can you cope with them? For instance the dominant and interfering mother of your lover can pose a major headache for your love life. At another time your partner’s ex can be a brutal threat to the success of your relationship. Those who erroneously date married people must know that the wife or husband will take their pound of flesh dangerously,should such affairs become public knowledge.

It is when you have a clear cut understanding of the strengths,weaknesses,opportunities and threats that your lover represents, that you can confidently say you are free from the vice of emotional gambling. It is the hallmark of all intelligent lovers. Have a remarkable week ahead.


Deji Olabode
Love Dynamics Global
Enthronement Assembly Lagos.
@lovedynamix on twitter

*Do mail us at the above email address for counseling and speaking engagements.
* Also feel free to download our free lovedynamix app at blackberry app world.

Enhanced by Zemanta

2 thoughts on “LOVE LOTTERY

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: