Finding someone to love is by far easier than keeping the one you have found. There are more who know how to find love than there are people who know how to keep it. If you ever lose your lover, the reasons though many, will not exclude TAKING YOUR PARTNER FOR GRANTED. This has been at the root of most relationship breakdowns in our era. There is an erroneous concept being popularized by many people in our day. Owing to past disappointments, many have come to believe that the less you show your true love for another, the more attached they will be to you.
This concept has given birth to a generation of lackadaisical lovers, who consider the shabby care for their lovers, a badge of honour. This has to change. In the following paragraphs, I want to itemize a step by step guide to losing your lover.
- TAKE YOUR LOVER’S PRESENCE FOR GRANTED. There are many who treat their partner’s presence as a non-event. Some even pick up calls without taking excuses from their lovers. Some engage in various activities while leaving their partner unattended. When we do this, no matter the excuse we make for it, the underlying message we are communicating to our lovers is that they aren’t important to us. Beyond that, we are telling them that what we are engaged in, is more important than them. The greatest honour you can give to your lover’s presence is your personal attention and if you can’t give them that attention there is no point in having them around.
- TAKE YOUR LOVER’S LOVE FOR GRANTED. It is unfortunate to acknowledge that some individuals aren’t mature enough to handle love. The slightest display of love goes into their head and they start misbehaving. The problem as such is not with the one loving but with the one receiving the love. The solution is not to stop displaying your love altogether, rather it is to find someone worthy of the level of love you are willing to display. It seems to me that everyone has a particular love level they can handle, to love them beyond that level is to trigger over-familiarity and rejection from them. On the contrary, those that can take in love, without taking their lover for granted are rare assets in love. These love superstars are so because they have come to discover that love is more than a right, it is a peculiar privilege. Not everyone alive will have the privilege of being loved by another human being, so we must in turn cherish the ones that love us.
- TAKE YOUR LOVER’S COMMITMENT FOR GRANTED. Sometimes pride can lure us into believing that our lovers are with us because they have no options. Stronger than this first deception is believing that we are the best possible choice for them on earth. Subscribing to these two fallacies, often makes us lethargic about our lovers. Only for us to be rudely awakened after they have transferred their commitment to someone else.
- TAKE YOUR LOVER’S CONTRIBUTIONS FOR GRANTED. True love doesn’t demand what you don’t have from yourself. It is content with receiving what you have from yourself. Unfortunately, there are lovers today, who aren’t dignified enough to appreciate their lovers for what they have been given. Rather, they are so busy complaining about what they aren’t able to get from their lovers. The maxim of love should be “such as I have give I unto you”. Any lover that demands of you, what you don’t have, without appreciating what you have given is a fraud. You deserve better.
The real danger of taking our partners for granted is that it positions us to lose them to people who place greater value on them. This is why we must be deliberate about nurturing our lover’s sense of importance and speciality, at every given opportunity, for as long as we are together. Those who don’t will someday have to pay dearly for the loss of their lover to another.
THE GREATEST IS LOVE.