Many people desire companionship but few know how to position themselves strategically for companionship. It is one thing to have a desire, it is another thing entirely for us to fulfill the criteria for those desires to come to pass. Except for those born with an inherent gift of celibacy, every human being desires to be united in love someday with someone of like minds, unfortunately this may not be everyone’s experience. Today I want to consider some ways by which many position themselves unknowingly for life long singleness. Hopefully by reversing these negatives, every companionship desiring single should be able to attain their goal of a satisfactory relationship. To die single,
LIVE A LIFE OF ISOLATION: I have seen some individuals who equate intense spirituality with extreme isolation. What some of them do actually is to pray fervently for the creator to send them a partner, while they choose to live in isolation. I guarantee you, such strategies will not work. I stand to be corrected but there is no documented record of any individual in the bible who got their partner by praying. This is not to downplay the role of prayers in choosing one’s lover. Such prayers should actually be for personal direction and positioning and not for divine delivery. What you will notice in scripture is that most of those who got into relationships did so by positioning themselves and exhibiting attractive character qualities. The best positioning is by developing multiple, credible and responsible platonic friendships. The fewer of such friends you have, the slimmer your chances are of finding a credible partner. It is high time we dump the idea that your partner will drop down for heaven,while you ignore opportunities for responsible friendships. It is time we get out of our comfort zones of isolation and start connecting aggressively and strategically with people of substance,because your future partner will come out of your friendship base. Every other recipe for marital union is fake. It is time for singles to develop social competence in platonic friendships. It is also time to exhibit maritally convincing qualities in such relationships. Hopefully, someone credible will take notice and your relational cum marital journey will begin from there.
HAVE A CANTANKEROUS PERSONALITY: It is unfortunate that there are individuals that are born fighters. They seem to thrive on conflict with those closest with them. These strife-ful personalities are the bile of human relationships. Over the years such people have developed a combination of negative habits such as argumentativeness, nagging,complaining, and accusation just to mention but a few. Such people simply aren’t fun to be around. They have a way of spiking your stress levels and debilitating your peace levels. If you are like this, I must let you know you may die single. Even when such people mistakenly find someone to marry them, their partner eventually gets tired and abandons them. Funny enough, they aren’t always abandoned for someone with a sweeter personality, sometimes they are simply abandoned for the sake of personal rest and peace. I know of adults who, even their children want nothing to do with, because of this tendency. If you are such a person, it is time to check it. If people don’t feel good about you, they aren’t likely to hang around you. People are addicted to fun, ease, rest and peace, if you represent none of the above, be sure that they will want nothing with you. Its time you deliberately work at being comfortable to be with.
This subject is so crucial that I will have to continue tomorrow. Make it a date with us. Hopefully you will learn something that will enable you overcome the challenge of singleness personally and in the life of those you love. I believe in you.
THE GREATEST IS LOVE.